PSA From Yours Truly #2

Folks, I can’t express in enough words the amount of anger and frustration I feel towards other drivers. I realize I am not the world’s greatest driver but I’m far from being the world’s worst.

Lately, on my commute to work, I have had difficulty merging onto the interstate as it seems my fellow early morning drivers don’t understand what it means to use the entrance ramp.

So I’ll take a few minutes out of my night to explain it to you. It won’t take long since you should have learned this before you received your license.

But hey! No judgement here..

Let’s begin!

There is this lane that allows you to enter the interstate known as the Entrance Ramp. While you’re on this said ramp, the point of using this ramp is to Accelerate.

If you don’t know what that word means, here is google’s definition:

Increase in the rate or speed of something.

That means while you are entering the interstate, your speed should be increasing. And by increasing, I mean you should be at the speed everyone else is moving at by the time you merge into the right lane.

If you aren’t quite sure what the word Increase means, here’s a definition:

To become or make greater in size, amount, intensity, or degree.

In simpler terms, you should be gaining speed as you move down the ramp. Not maintaining the same speed and most certainly not losing speed.

By no means should you still be at 45-50mph while merging onto the interstate unless traffic is backed up and you have no choice.

If traffic is moving at its regular speed, you best be matching that speed by the time you reach the end of the entrance ramp.

This isn’t just for the fact that it makes it harder to merge onto the interstate when you’re doing 10-15mph less than you should. Yoohoo! It’s a safety precaution.

Safety Precaution! 

I’m just throwing it out there, if you don’t want someone slamming into the back of your car because they are going the correct speed while you decide to take a long Sunday night drive when in fact it’s Wednesday morning in rush hour traffic, I highly suggest you put your foot on the gas pedal and press down! Press down as hard as you can. Put the pedal to the metal!

This way you’ll be at a decent speed that will allow you to safely merge onto the interstate without causing an accident or being an inconvenience to your fellow drivers.

And like I’ve said numerous times before, if you can’t use your brain while driving on a crowded interstate, do us all a favor and just don’t drive!

That is all!

Love,

Yours Truly

Public Service Announcement from Yours Truly

Folks,

I realize we don’t wake up in the morning saying to ourselves “Hey, I think today is the day to crash my car and cause rush hour traffic to be backed up worse than usual.” But because of some reckless driver, there is always an accident causing delays in our morning routine. Not just one day a week, but almost every day during the work week.

And if it’s alright by y’all if I say so, and excuse my French, it’s fucking ridiculous!

For those reckless drivers, if your goal was to piss a bunch of people off, causing an accident during rush hour is by far the BEST way to accomplish your goal so kudos to you!

And for those drivers who are reckless and have not caused an accident yet, let’s be honest, it’s going to happen sooner than later so here are a few tips for you:

Tips For Safe Driving-

1) Realizing the universe doesn’t revolve around you is a start. That may be news to you and I’m sure it’s come as a shock but you’ll be much happier once you realize that minor fact about life. You are NOT the only driver on the roadways. Please take that into consideration while you drive from Point A to Point B.

2) There is this lovely thing posted along the side of the road known as the Speed Limit. I’m well aware that some people see that more as a suggestion than an actual rule that’s enforced but it’s not. So instead of doing 20 over, do less. Much less.

3) All that weaving, bobbing and zigzagging you do throughout traffic- JUST STOP! It’s obvious you should have left earlier than you did and now you’re driving like a fool, putting every other driver at risk. Seriously! JUST STOP! Accept the fact that you’ll be late and consider leaving earlier next time.

4) If you know the Lord Almighty did not bless you with the World’s Greatest Driving Skills, please consider getting a chauffeur. I assure you that we’d be forever grateful.

5) There are these objects on the side of your vehicle called mirrors. USE them! Stop side swiping other vehicles because you forgot to check your mirror. Stop making other drivers swerve to miss your idiotic self. I promise you, those mirrors are there for a reason. They’re not just there to look pretty. They serve a purpose. The sooner you realize that, the better!

6) THINK before you drive!

I just want one morning when my hour commute isn’t delayed or affected by a car accident. A morning that drivers decide to be respectful of others around them, use their brains and actually drive as if their lives depend on it. Because NEWS FLASH; your life does depend on you and the others driving around you.

I understand that’s asking a hell of a lot, but it’s doable.

Sincerely, 

Yours Truly

Horns that speak YOUR mind!

If you’ve ever sat through Atlanta traffic during Rush Hour, you will know what I’m talking about. 

During rush hour, traffic is awful. Some days it’s worse than awful. It’s just downright unbearable and complete HELL! 

And it doesn’t matter if it’s Monday or if it’s Thursday evening, drivers are blowing their horns as if there’s no tomorrow. 

At times I want to blow my horn at idiot drivers but would it do any good? 

I heard a few horns this afternoon on my commute home and I had absolutely no idea who was honking their horns or at whom. 

So I began thinking..

And people know I shouldn’t be given time to think because my mind goes every which way. There are times when I overthink situations and other times I have the most absurd ideas. 

Today would be one of those latter times. 

In rush hour I was baffled at who was honking the horn and to whom it was directed towards. 

So here’s my outlandish idea:

Why doesn’t some brilliant individual create a car horn that speaks your mind? 

Now this horn should have several buttons that you may press in order to deliver a different message for each situation you may find yourself in while in the driver seat of a vehicle. 

Option One: Say some foolish driver is going 10 miles per hour under the speed limit. 

Button #1A should deliver a message that could nicely ask the driver to speed up or change lanes so you may pass. 

Button #2B could say something more along the lines of “Get your ass out of my way” if #1A doesn’t get your point across.

Option Two: The Lord only knows how hard driving between two lines is. My gosh it’s difficult. Just difficult! 

Button #2 would cut straight to the point. If you can’t drive within the lines then you need your license revoked. This button would say “Yo idiot, stay in your lane or get a Chauffeur!” 

See? Straight to the point!

Option Three: I’m not a fan of people who cut others off. Excuse me but last time I checked, I was driving here. It pisses me off!

Button #3: There’s really no words appropriate for situations like this one mentioned above so this button would simply have a rant of explicit words headed your way. 

It realize that comes off as rude but so is cutting other drivers off!

Option Four: One of my biggest pet peeves is when drivers don’t turn their head lights on when it’s either dark out or it’s pouring down rain. 

Excuse me but it’s not only for my safety, it’s for yours as well. If you don’t want me rear ending your ass, you may want to learn how to turn them on.

I’ve honked my horn numerous times at individuals who were driving without them during necessary times. Never got my point across.

Button #4 would simply say “Mr/Mrs. Inconsiderate, please feel free to turn your lights on at any given second.” 

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I could go on and on for days about this new horn invention but I won’t. 

As absurd as this idea sounds, it would embarrass the drivers who are guilty of cutting you off, not using their lights, driving in a lane that’s obviously too fast for their liking and who can’t drive in between the lines. 

Maybe public humiliation would teach them to respect the drivers around them. Or not.

At least you wouldn’t be left guessing why some driver was blaring their horn during rush hour. You may not know which car it’s coming from but you’ll finally know why. 

I’m a curious individual. I must know why! 

Plus, whatever rage you had previously been feeling was let out by honking your horn with the appropriate message. It’s a win/win!

So if you’re a brilliant individual who wants to invent something new, feel free to use this idea. Just make sure to give me a percentage of the profit when it’s all said and done! 

Gracias!